I've been in kind of a slump lately, hence the lack of blog posts. I love blogs. Reading them makes me happy. I have my favourites and check them daily. Reading blogs make me feel connected, less lonely sometimes, and normal, in the way that perfect strangers' lives ressemble my own. And they make me laugh. So much. I would love to be as prolific a blog writer as some of these women are, but right now, it's not a reality. I often marvel at the way these bloggers seem to write effortlessly, always coming up with new material, while I struggle to find something to write about. I marvel that some of these bloggers have become so successfull and so read, that they can make a living out of their blog. I find it incredible, in a very good way.
Rather than putting myself down for not being that kind of a writer (something that I would have done a lot in the past), I'm just choosing to use these writers as an inspiration. Instead of dwelling in envy and comparison ("I wish I were as ....as...", "I wish I could .... as well as ...."), I use the coveted attributes of the people I admire as catalysts to set goals for my own self-development. It's a work in progress, but all is takes to move forward are baby steps.
I'm also learning to let go of expectations. Expectations seem to always set you up for failure and disappointment. When you choose not to expect anything, you allow yourself to live in the moment, as it is, and to enjoy it for what it is, no strings attached. That's the approach I have chosen for March break, this week. I use to struggle when the kids where on vacation with expectations of what should or could happen. Lately, I've just let go of that. Instead, I'm just letting every day unfold on its own. I know I won't be able to do much work and I'm ok with that. I don't have a plan. The kids and I will wake up each day and decide what we will do. No imposition, no expectation, and that makes me feel peaceful and happy.
Over the last few days, I have been touched, as many, by the images and stories unfolding from the Japan Quake. This natural disaster has a very personal twist for us as my brother-in-law lives in a suburb of Tokyo. Though we know that he survived the quake and the tsunami, fear of radiation from the nuclear power plants is prominent in our mind and we pray that all will be well in the end. Jason was with us two weeks ago and parts of me wishes he had decided to stick around here a few more days. He arrived on Thursday in Japan, a day before the quake.
To know that so many are experiencing this tragedy is humbling. Our daily dramas certainly don't seem like a big deal when confronted by such a slap-in-the-face perspective. If we could only live every day with the knowledge of how fortunate we are and how little some of our "problems" truly are, I'm sure we'd smarten up a little about our daily dramas and we would end up being happier for it.
What have you done for your "Me" today? With March break, it might be harder to have some Me time, but today, my Me time was actually a combination of moments during which I simply gazed at the sky and magnificent sunshine, felt the warmer temperatures, and thanked the universe for signs of the upcoming Spring. Have you noticed there are more birds singing, snow melting and house plants thriving? The addition of one glorious hour of daylight is enough to boost my happiness quotient through the roof.
Have a great March break everyone.